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Robot Vs. Cat, Super Couch, & Top Weekend Status Updates

February 13, 2015 by FunnyStatus Team

Make your weekend last longer, share one of these..

Top 20 Weekend Facebook Status Updates:

  1. I think I’ve moved past procrastinating into actually jeopardizing my future.
  2. If watermelon exists why don’t airmelon, firemelon and earthmelon exist?
    …..the elemelons
  3. “so how are things?”
    me: please don’t make me think about my life
  4. I always change my mind about everything except the password I have been using since I was 10.
  5. to wait a long time & get no help press 1
    to wait a long time & get no help press 2
    to wait a long time & get no help press 3
    redirecting
  6. I never know whether to screw up my taxes myself or hire a professional to do it.
  7. The worst way to locate your glasses is by the sound they make when you step on them.
  8. There should be an award for anyone who actually finishes a tube of chapstick.
  9. I hope you step on a Lego.
  10. I’m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them.
  11. Having a dry wedding is a great way to reduce the number of RSVP’s.
  12. I’m “as long as we eat before 8pm” years old.
  13. To heal a wound you need to stop touching it.
  14. I’m in no shape to exercise.
  15. Ever have pizza at a friend’s as a kid and experience quiet horror at her family’s choice of toppings? That feeling is my entire love life.
  16. Growing old is being increasingly Penalized for a crime you haven’t committed!
  17. Bugs know exactly where the opening in the window is. They just like to f*ck with you. Nature’s trolls.
  18. You can call someone who makes prosthetics a professional body builder.
  19. Monkeys made it to space before we did without even trying.
  20. Since Disney now owns Star Wars and the new one will be out this year, featuring Princess Leia. That would now make her a Disney Princess.

Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates…

Post by Witty Hilarious and Ridiculously Funny Status Updates.

Robot Plays with Cat, Kittens are Terrified..

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qv1nXXSB65E[/youtube]

Just animals being adorable in HD, that’s all.

Have a great weekend! Tons more status updates, funny pictures, and videos… On our Fan Page & Download our Free iPhone App. See you on Valentines Day for a special update.

Filed Under: Facebook Status Updates Tagged With: Robot Vs. Cat, Super Couch, Top Weekend Status Updates

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