Make the weekend last longer, share these…
On Point Facebook Status Updates:
- We’ve officially reached that annoying time in the year where it’s sweater weather in the morning, but by midday you die from a heatstroke.
- Don’t like my sarcasm? Well, I don’t like your stupid.
- I wanted to work out but then I wanted to not work out more.
- It’s always a good day when you come across someone that you can unfriend on Facebook.
- If I had a dollar for every bad date I’ve been on, I wouldn’t have to date anymore because I’d be independently wealthy.
- Nearly finished with your makeup. Mascara wand brushes your cheek. LIFE OVER.
- I’m going to switch my insurance from Geico to Allstate, then Statefarm, then back to Geico. If i’m correct, they should owe me $950.
- It saddens me that today’s youth will never have to endure the character-building pain of waiting for dial-up Internet to connect.
- I call my fists Thunder & Lightning because there’s about a one in a million chance that they’ll cause any damage.
- You can’t turn a lesson into love but if you’re not careful you might turn a love into a lesson.
- My shower only has two options: 3rd degree burns or skinny dipping in Antarctica.
- Alien 1: Did the humans get our message?
Alien 2: Yes, But they named it Dubstep and they dance to it. - Remember when you thought you’d have it all together by the time you were the age you are now? LOL
- I’m getting tired of fat people doing laps around the all-you-can-eat buffet in their little scooters.
- The youth of today have it way too easy. Just once I would like to see them have to go through the trouble of blowing into a video game just to make it work.
- It’s called a “remote” because those are your odds of finding it when you want to change the channel.
- Chinese food to go: $16.84. Gas to go get it: $1.62. Getting home and realizing they forgot one of your containers: Riceless.
- My Mama is gonna be pissed when she realizes how much drama I have saved for her.
- The next person I hear say “I love fall” is getting choked out with a scarf soaked in pumpkin spice latte.
- 3 more payments to Whole Foods and that Naked Juice is so mine.
Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates… | Win an iPad Mini
Rescue Bassett Hound and Lil Kid Dance the Day Away…
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txtGAS4p3YA[/youtube]
Soooo, cute! Not a care in the world 🙂 Times like these are what life is all about.
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