Real Toy Story, Drifting Cats, & StatusGrams

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Status Updates for Facebook or Instagram:

  1. The fridge is a clear example that what matters is what’s inside.
  2. My Tupperware lids and single socks are chilling somewhere laughing at me. Jerks
  3. Are we having some drinks, or are we havin’ some DRANKS? I need to dress appropriately.
  4. I love “cereal for dinner nights.”
  5. Marriage is the only legal way to trade cash for sex.
  6. Those of you who say “I’ll sleep when I’m dead” don’t really get how the whole “dead” thing works, do you?
  7. A zombie boyfriend will love you for your brain and not your body.
  8. This world is not going to make any progress until we stop perpetuating the belief that “paper” beats “rock.”
  9. I feel like people who eat breakfast really have their lives together.
  10. There’s like 7 billion people in this world and I have like 4 friends.
  11. If your girlfriend doesn’t like that bitch, you don’t talk to that bitch.
  12. Girl’s logic: When you like a guy, do nothing about it and expect him to magically know and make the first move.
  13. The only thing worse than having a song stuck in your head for an entire day is not knowing the name of the song.
  14. You think I’m not online.
    But I’m always here.
    Even if I’m not liking/commenting.
    I’m here.
    Scrolling.
    Judging.
  15. If two people are arguing and one person says, “You know what…” that argument is about to get awesome.
  16. At the beginning of a relationship, I wonder if women rub their hands together and say “Let the games begin!”
  17. Damn girl! Do you have 11 protons? Because you are sodium fine.
  18. That awkward moment when your in super deep thought. Then 3 minutes later you realize you are staring directly at someone.
  19. Whoever the fuck thought of the idea for pants with fake pockets should be placed in a mental institution.
  20. Don’t stress the people from your past, there’s a reason why they didn’t make it to your future.

Yesterdays Status Updates… | Free Timeline Covers

They are really real…

The toys from Toy Story are real!

I knew it!

Cats Drifting:

Check out the turning radius on those bad boys! What a thrill 🙂

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