Make your weekend last longer, share these…
Top 20 Best (Most Liked) Status Updates from this week:
- Every day after lunch I get a little sad because the food is over.
- PT Cruisers: The Nickelback of cars.
- Midnight snack? More like Midnight 3 Course Meal…with dessert.
- Sometimes you have to forget what’s gone, appreciate what still remains, and look forward to what’s coming next.
- What I do when I can’t hear someone…
1. Tell them I can’t hear them.
2.Move closer so I can hear.
3. Repeatedly shout WHAT?!
4. Laugh, and hope it wasn’t a question.
- Sometimes I check my messages to make sure I still have none.
- Do you ever get the feeling that you’re being watched? Because if it’s bothering you, I’ll stop.
- Am I the only one that when somebody says “10 years ago”, thinks about 90’s instead of 2004?
- Planning on putting faux engagement rings in couples drinks on Valentines Day and watching the magic unfold.
- Burger King is offering delivery service in some areas. I don’t trust it. Everyone knows it’s impossible to drive without eating the fries.
- 10 million people share the same birthday as you. Your personalized horoscope means shit.
- If you emphasize the ‘po’ in police they’re probably already after you.
- Instead of knowing what the #1 song was when you were born it would be cool if it could tell you what the #1 song will be when you die. That way when you start hearing it on the radio, you’ll know that the end is near.
- The only way to communicate with a drunk person is to get hammered too.
- Don’t you hate it when spiders bite you and you get like zero superpowers?
- If you say “Raise Up Lights” you just said “Razor Blades” in an Australian accent.
- Why is it that people who drink energy drinks seem like the people with the least amount of stuff going on?
- You’re not a hoe? So are you like a volunteer prostitute?
- It’s too bad you can’t punch someone’s personality.
- Your way sounds really slow. I’m going with the highway.
Polar Bears First Steps…
IF that didn’t melt your heart, I don’t know what will.