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Cool Facebook Status Updates
- Taco Bell has so many festive names for the same three ingredients.
- If a guy messes up, there is nothing he can say to fix the issue. If a girl messes up, the guy somehow messed up too and she plays victim.
- You know the times where you’re laying on your back looking at your phone by lifting it in the air but lose your grip and hit yourself in the face?
- I have more unmatched socks than I do matching socks.
- My best friends are the ones that have the most dirt on me.
- Summer is real cute until every fucking type of insect comes out of the 8th circle of hell!
- There’s no business like minding your own.
- I hate that sinking feeling you get after reading or hearing something you wish you hadn’t.
- Friends are forever, until they get in a relationship.
- I accidentally spilled spot remover on my dog and now he’s gone.
- I wasn’t mad. Then you asked me 10 times if I was mad. Now I’m mad.
- Yesterday: tired
Next week: tired
Next month: tired
Next year: tired
Next life: tired
- If Plan A doesn’t work, the alphabet has 25 more letters. Keep calm.
- Telling someone that you’re going to bed when you’re actually not, and then having to stay off the interwebs.
- Text a girl ”hey beautiful” and trust me, you could make her whole day.
- I’m literally my own best friend. I have inside jokes with myself, and sometimes I’ll start laughing out loud at how funny I am.
- That awesome moment, when you and your best friend look at each other and know exactly what you are thinking and both laugh.
- I really don’t understand how my room gets so messy when I literally sit in one spot with my laptop all day.
- I got 99 problems and I can’t remember any of them so I guess that makes a hundred.
- Too bored to do nothing. Too lazy to do anything.
Puh-Puh-Pleaassseeeeeeee sez KittEhhhh:
Dawww, OK kitty, I’ll give you anything you’d like 🙂
Crane Climb (WARNING: Terrifying if you’re scared of heights!)
Wow, that was INSANE! If you thought that was crazy, share it!