These will score you laughs, share them…
20 Chuckle Worthy Facebook Status Updates:
- If a man says you’re ugly, he’s being mean.
If a woman says you’re ugly, she’s jealous.
If a little kid says you’re ugly, then you’re ugly.
- If we goto a restaurant and have to choose between a table or a booth and you say table… I will never trust you again!
- No matter what I get, it’s impossible not to sound like a douche when saying my order at Starbucks.
- Trail mix? Oh, you mean M&M’s with obstacles.
- Ever pretend like you didn’t see something so the other person doesn’t feel embarrassed?
- Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll be really far away from me with your motivational bullshit.
- Girls find out Everything. I advise you not to lie to them.
- If puppies could talk I would never even want to try and make human friends ever again.
- Is everything expensive or am I just poor?
- I hate getting flashbacks from things I don’t want to remember.
- When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it’s for them?
- The problem with money is too much of it belongs to people who aren’t me.
- People who live in bouncy castles shouldn’t throw darts.
- I’m moving the economy along one bar at a time.
- How is it that skating on thin ice can get you into hot water.
- Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?
- I want my children to have all the things I never had so then I can move in with them.
- If you want something you never had, then you’ve got to do something you’ve never done.
- If only I could get that wonderful feeling of accomplishment without having to accomplish anything.
- A shark will only attack you if you’re wet.
2,000 Ping Pong Balls Lit on Fire, this happens…
That would freak me out! Share if you thought that was crazy.