Picture People, Ping Pong Fire, and Chuckle Worthy Statuses

These will score you laughs, share them…

20 Chuckle Worthy Facebook Status Updates:

1. If a man says you’re ugly, he’s being mean.
   If a woman says you’re ugly, she’s jealous.
   If a little kid says you’re ugly, then you’re ugly.
2. If we goto a restaurant and have to choose between a table or a booth and you say table… I will never trust you again!
3. No matter what I get, it’s impossible not to sound like a douche when saying my order at Starbucks.
4. Trail mix? Oh, you mean M&M’s with obstacles.
5. Ever pretend like you didn’t see something so the other person doesn’t feel embarrassed?
6. Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll be really far away from me with your motivational bullshit.
7. Girls find out Everything. I advise you not to lie to them.
8. If puppies could talk I would never even want to try and make human friends ever again.
9. Is everything expensive or am I just poor?
10. I hate getting flashbacks from things I don’t want to remember.
11. When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it’s for them?
12. The problem with money is too much of it belongs to people who aren’t me.
13. People who live in bouncy castles shouldn’t throw darts.
14. I’m moving the economy along one bar at a time.
15. How is it that skating on thin ice can get you into hot water.
16. Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?
17. I want my children to have all the things I never had so then I can move in with them.
18. If you want something you never had, then you’ve got to do something you’ve never done.
19. If only I could get that wonderful feeling of accomplishment without having to accomplish anything.
20. A shark will only attack you if you’re wet.

 Yesterdays Status Updates… | Best Stocking Stuffer Under $25

2,000 Ping Pong Balls Lit on Fire, this happens…

That would freak me out! Share if you thought that was crazy.