Score more likes, share these…
ROFL Status Updates:
- Your best friend is someone who you can have a conversation with through facial expressions alone.
- I hate it when people tell me I look young for my age because it implies my age is old.
- The best government job has to be assigning names to secret operations.
- Some people are normal…what an awful, boring existence that must be.
- Saying to your friend “Hey, there’s your best friend!” when you see someone they hate.
- I turn down my radio to park my car.
- I’m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them.
- I don’t judge people based on color, race, religion, sexuality, or gender…I base it on whether or not they’re an asshole.
- You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy food and that’s pretty much the same thing.
- Every kid knows this conversation:
“Hey, did you ask yet?”
“No, my moms in a bad mood.”
- When you think about it, the little old man behind the curtain in Oz was the original catfish.
- If you eat it in the car before you get home, it never existed.
- I could amaze you with the things I don’t know and terrify you with the things I do know.
- I’m bored. Anyone need anything avenged?
- One time I put my phone in my pocket and didn’t take it out for like almost 5 minutes.
- Rule #1 of the Internet: Nothing you put online, even for a second, can ever be taken down.
- You make my tummy flutter.
It’s kind of uncomfortable.
- If a woman is talking to me about her problems, I better be the cause of them.
- My goal today is to turn actions into thoughts.
- Why talk when you can type?
Just a Puppy in a Onesie That’s All…
How cute is that? But, everyone knows Onesies look even cuter on kitty 😉 good luck getting it on them!
This Goat Needs a Throat Lozenge, stat!
Poor goat! But, that was kinda awesome 🙂