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Funny Facebook Status Updates:
- Part of being sane is being a little bit crazy. (From our *UPDATED YESTERDAY!* ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
- Quick question: If you’re in a car with someone who talks a mile a minute, will going 60mph in reverse shut them up?
- I climbed the ladder of success, but I think the others were smart enough to take the elevator.
- No matter how loud car alarms are, cars never seem to wake up.
- Never bring a ladle to a knife fight. You’ll be able to dish it out but you’ll never be able to take it.
If you want to understand politics, you have to read between the lies.
A dry sense of humor is better than slobbering all over the place.
- *Wake up in middle of night, look at clock* yes I still have time to sleep. (80+Likes in 8minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
- Starbucks has a new 40th anniversary drink that’s sugar-free, fat-free and contains no whipped cream. It’s called coffee.
- If you love something, let it go out with the guys once in a while.
- When I was born I was so lazy, my parents had to feed me and dress me and carry me around with them all day.
It’s difficult to have a committed relationship with a schizophrenic. They’re always seeing other people.
- I watch a scary movie, I’m perfectly fine, then I go to bed and remember EVERY SINGLE SCARY MOMENT IN THE MOVIE.
- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
- My internet went down. By which I mean my neighbors changed their password.
- Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason. (VIA Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff)
My body is a temple. Of doom.
You Fancy huh? Your DIVA Facebook friends will appreciate that picture!
They found Nemo:
That will brighten anyone’s day on Facebook. Post that one on your wall to get more LIKEs and thoughtful comments!
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