Take your pick, and score more likes…
The Weeks Best Facebook Status Updates:
- Sleep feels the way Pizza tastes.
- If all grownups had to take naps, the world would be a much nicer place.
- Sorry, I can’t today. My sister’s friend’s mother’s grandfather’s brother’s grandson’s uncle’s fish died, and yes, it was tragic.
- It’s been one of those days where my middle finger was the answer to every question.
- I tried to be normal once…worst 2 minutes of my life.
- Oh, you don’t like dogs? You must have no soul.
- I already want to take a nap tomorrow.
- Bed: A magical place where I suddenly remember everything I was supposed to do.
- An extra month of summer would be great.
- Bitch, I grew up on the streets (Sesame)
- My week is basically:
– Monday #2
– Monday #3
– Monday #4
- When people tell me “You’re gonna regret that in the morning” I sleep in til noon, because I’m a problem solver.
- No matter how hard I try, I just never seem to run out of bad ideas.
- Whenever I lock my car up I always press the remote lock button twice in a row to let all nearby thieves know that I mean business.
- Like in the movie SWAT, I would like to extend the same deal, “I will give one-hundred million dollars to whoever gets me outta here!!”. I’m at work, ok…it’s not 100 million dollars it’s more like a $10 coupon to pizza hut…well its more of a buy one for $5 and get one of lesser or equal value free kinda deal. I’ll be waiting!!
- Science, where are we at with magic carpets?
- That awkward moment when everyone you’re with is talking about losing weight, while you’re sitting there eating loads of food.
- I never feel older than in the 12 seconds I spend on web pages scrolling down to my birth year.
- I’m not a comedian. I don’t tell jokes. I just tell the truth in a way it sounds funny.
- That awkward moment when you realize you didn’t zip your pants.
Two KittEhhs Sleep In Shoeboxes..
There has to be a nursery rhyme that accompanies this picture.
Lizard Loves Belly Rubs:
It’s nice to see a Lizard get so excited about something that isn’t car insurance. Share if you enjoyed.