Ice Avalanche, On Being Healthy, & Crazy Status Updates

Step Your Status Game Up, Use These…

Crazy Funny Statuses:

  1. I’m not anti-social,
    I’m anti-bullshit.
  2. Hungry isn’t even a feeling for me anymore…it’s basically a personality trait.
  3. If it came down to it, I could probably survive on Skittles and beer.
  4. Seeing a spider isn’t a problem. It becomes a problem when it disappears.
  5. Being productive sounds like a good plan until you have to put on clothes.
  6. Do you ever think Luigi is pissed that they are called Mario Brothers and not Luigi Brothers?
  7. Decaf only works if you throw it on people.
  8. I like to reward myself for getting up on time by laying in bed for another 20 minutes.
  9. I hate “2-faced” people.
    It’s so hard to decide which face to slap first.
  10. If we’re not supposed to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?
  11. 2014 is so close i can almost taste the lips I will not be kissing on New Year’s Eve.
  12. The worst thing about having a Costco membership is having to hire a lifeguard every time my son opens our pickle jar.
  13. People who really love their jobs are annoying. Keep that shit to yourself.
  14. I hate it when I get the point, but the person continues to elaborate.
  15. Ever wish the choice you made and the “right thing to do” were the same thing?
  16. My biggest fear used to be getting sick and dying, now it’s of me dropping my iPhone in the toilet.
  17. I’m not sure if I’m hungry but I’m gonna eat anyway just in case.
  18. Best part about not having a boyfriend is not having someone ignore me during football season.
  19. If somebody ever stole my identity, I’m pretty sure they’d give it right back.
  20. If you don’t count any of my failures, I’m quite successful.

 Yesterdays Status Updates… | Best Stocking Stuffer Under $25

Being Healthy Has New Meaning…

Roof Full of Ice Comes Crashing Down…

WOW! They are lucky nobody got hurt. That was insane!

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