Hilarious Statuses that will leave them begging for more!

Been visiting our page for awhile now?  Funniest person on Facebook?  Don’t worry, we got you covered, post these and watch the comments/likes fly…

Funny Statuses:

  • It’s going to be weird still checking Facebook when I’m 70. (Courtesy of our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone/iPod App)
  • A zombie boyfriend will love you for your brain and not your body.
  • Marriage is about give and take. You better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.
  • My favorite yoga position is Downward-Facing Nap.
  • Heard the geese start to return this morning. I just hope they don’t go overboard on Facebook with pictures from their vacation.
  • Everyone brings joy to my life. Some when they enter it and some when they leave it.
  • If you were killed tomorrow, I wouldn’t be at your funeral because I would be in jail for killing the person that killed you.
  • Facebook is a substitute for real human interaction, which explains its popularity. ツ (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
  • How do they fit all that money inside such a tiny credit card???
  • I keep forgetting the “o” part of “Hello.” My boss is NOT happy with the way I’ve been answering his phone.
  • You should never trust a person as far as you can throw them. Needless to say, I trust the heck out of babies.
  • Local News. A couple turned themselves into police. Wonder what they were before.
  • Man you’re old when getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot. (VIA our Twitter Account: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • I live in constant fear of dropping my iPhone

Facebook Profile Pic of the Day:

The Internet. Ruining your childhood one picture at a time.

The Internet. Ruining your childhood one picture at a time.

Funny Video for your wall:


I know, I know, Charlie Sheen is getting old fast.  But, you gotta admit that one was good!  Don’t believe me?  Post it on your FB Wall and watch the reactions roll in.

Not enough funny content for your Facebook profile?  If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus.