Be a local Facebook Hero post these…
Facebook Status Updates:
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Ⓟⓛⓔⓐⓢⓔ ⓓⓞⓝ’ⓣ ⓑⓤⓡⓢⓣ ⓜⓨ ⓑⓤⓑⓑⓛⓔⓢ (From our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
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Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. George Carlin
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For this year, I’m giving up women. Of course, it looks like they’ve pretty much beaten me to it.
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I hate when I miss a call by a few seconds, call the person back and they don`t answer.
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You can rely on me. I’ve been married. I’m trained to follow orders.
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I may not be the only egomaniac around here, but I’m the only one that matters.
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If you have plans to teach your children the value of dollar, you better hurry up.
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I’m not needy. I’m wanty. (103+Likes in 11minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
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The only way I’m going to drop ten pounds is if I go shopping in England.
- I have a black eye in karate.
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Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Today, you’re here. Coincidence?
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Football consists of 22 men on the field desperately in need of a rest and 50,000 in the stands desperately in need of exercise.
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All is not lost. It’s just a little bit hard to keep track of.
- Cool little fact… You can’t hum if you plug your nose…. bet you’ve just tried it. LOL
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The reason worry kills more people than work is because more people worry than work.
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My “Sleep Number” is pretty much 24/7.
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On a walk, my son saw a pay phone, asked what it was. I made him look it up on his Blackberry. (VIA Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff)
Thousands More EPIC Status Updates…
Ladies & Gentlemen I give you The Overly Happy Hamster….
LOL! Post that one on your Facebook Wall and watch the comments & LIKEs FLY in!!!
Lady gets some volume in her hair:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgJc2Ser6Vo[/youtube]
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