Great Dane Tantrum, Instagram, and Great Facebook Statuses

Make Monday awesome, share one of these…

20 Great Facebook Status Ideas:

  1. I wonder if Monday can see my middle finger from here?
  2. The hardest part about studying is actually starting.
  3. It’s really cute when people forget your existence until they need something.
  4. I always try to cheer myself up by singing when I get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems.
  5. 95% of the time when I’m smiling at my phone it’s because of something I said, not something someone sent me. I’m hilarious.
  6. If you don’t know what you want in life you’ll get caught up in someone else’s.
  7. The songs I like always come on when I’m supposed to be getting out of my car.
  8. A soulmate is someone who appreciates your level of weird.
  9. Much like a dog, men will pretty much do anything you want if you feed them first.
  10. When your life flashes before your eyes does that include the black outs? That’d be cool. Like your life but with never before seen footage.
  11. I will buy anything with the words “pumpkin spice” on the label.
  12. Common sense is a crayon that’s missing from most people’s boxes.
  13. Facebook is neat because it provides a platform for me to connect with old friends, make new ones, and figure out which one’s are completely insane.
  14. This girl is ignoring me like a check engine light.
  15. *too hot* blanket off *too cold* Put blanket on *too hot again* Stick on foot out…..perfect. *hears creepy noise* Sticks foot back in.
  16. I wish people came with a “demo” button.
  17. Cop: Do you know how fast you were going? Me: I was trying to keep up with traffic. Cop: There’s no traffic. Me: That’s how far behind I am!
  18. ATMs should require you to pass a breathalyzer before you can make a withdrawal after midnight.
  19. There are 2 types of people in this world, those who press “door close” in the elevator before others can jump on & those who are liars.
  20. RANDOM FACT: Having eye contact for more than 6 seconds without looking away or blinking reveals a desire for either sex or murder.

Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates…

Great Dane Throws a Temper Tantrum…

What an adorable giant 🙂 Share if you enjoyed.

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