Make Monday fun, share one of these..
20 Ridiculous Status Updates:
- You never really appreciate an unblocked nose until you have a blocked nose.
- On the bright side, selfie sticks are also lightning rods.
- I’m really over this working for a living shit.
- Some of us are still “it” from a childhood game of tag.
- Charging your phone for 5 minutes before you leave, because you think it will make a difference.
- Slow runners make fast runners look good. You’re welcome.
- When I was a kid and I wanted to be older, this sh*t was not what I expected.
- On a scale of 1 to Nature Valley granola bar, how much is your life falling apart?
- I’m so lonely I drive around town with a coffee cup glued to the roof of my car just so people will wave at me.
- The problem with drinking with people from work is they’re the ones I bitch about when I’m drunk.
- I feel like A&E and MTV are in a secret competition to see who can discover the worst human being alive.
- Women can walk around all day long in a bikini, but God forbid if you see them in their bras and panties. I will never comprehend this.
- me: I’m going to bed early tonight.
me: is that the sun
- Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “I know it’s hard. You’re going to be OK. Here’s 6 million dollars and a beer.”
- I can’t tell if I’m dealing well with life or just don’t give a shit anymore.
- I think I figured out Victoria’s Secret. She’s hungry.
- That awkward moment when you’re telling the truth but then you smile and no one believes you.
- I don’t think I can call myself an adult until I can accept the fact that “dry clean only” is not a dare.
- F.R.I.E.N.D.S: (F)ight for you. (R)espect you. (I)nvolve you. (E)ncourage you. (N)eed you. (D)eserve you. (S)ave you.
- 3 things I will never understand:
1. The meaning of life
2. The universe
3. How Spongebob & Patrick made those sounds effects in that box
All. The. Time.
Cat has an interesting way to give high five..
The sound of this soft paw hitting the hand is so satisfying… Please share if you enjoyed 🙂
Lots more status updates, funny pictures, and video, on our Fan Page.