Godfather KittEh, Golden Guitar, and 20 Entertaining Facebook Statuses

Get over hump day, share these…

Top 20 Entertaining Facebook Statuses:

1. I’m so in Debt, I could start a Government.
2. I go deaf when I’m texting.
3. What if dreams are just glimpses of alternate universes?
4. When I go to bed, half the time I’m not really sleeping. I’m usually lying there making up scenarios in my head.
5. BREAKING NEWS: New $100 bills start circulating yesterday. I wish this affected my life in any way.
6. There are cheaper ways to get people to call you a douchebag than buying Affliction shirts.
7. Sexy singles in your area want to meet you, then ignore you while you both stare at your phones.
8. Republicans are red, Democrats are blue. The government is shut down cause neither one gives a damn about you.
9. Nothing gets me motivated for 10-15 seconds like a good inspirational quote.
10. Kid, I can take you out the same way I brought you into this world, by making it look like an accident.
11. Once I’ve stolen enough rubber bands to complete my rubber band ball, I am SO quitting this stupid job.
12. When someone says “You’ve changed.”, it simply means you’ve stopped living your life their way.
13. My Super Power is opening text messages and mentally responding…then forgetting to actually respond.
14. The best revenge is massive success.
15. Everybody learns how to dance when they drop a knife.
16. Smart Man Smart Woman = Romance . Smart Man Dumb Woman = Affair . Dumb Man Smart Woman = Marriage
17. Nothing last forever, except everything that’s been posted online.
18. I will respect any religion you practice as long as you never knock on my door to tell me about it.
19. Where do homeless people find all these sharpies?
20. I’m bored. Anyone want to start a band?

Yesterdays Status Updates…

The Godfather KitteHhh…

“Someday, and that day may never come, I’ll call upon you to do a service for me. But, until that day, accept this justice as a gift”

Golden Retriever Loves Guitar…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2-GJ3hsAM0[/youtube]

Wow, that doggy really loves his guitar! So smart and cute 🙂