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Funniest Facebook Status Updates

April 4, 2011 by FunnyStatus Team

True. We’ve got the funniest status updates in all of the land! Make yourself the local Facebook celebrity by posting these instant classics…

Funny Statuses:

  • Why aren’t there adult-sized playgrounds? (Courtesy of our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone/iPod App)
  • A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life, to be thankful for a good one.
  • The best way to get rid of a telemarketer is to ask them what they are wearing.
  • Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.
  • If flattery gets you nowhere, try bribery.
  • Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, “Where the heck is the ceiling?”
  • So I’ve narrowed it down and I’m either gonna start a motorcycle gang or take a nap.
  • If it’s free, it’s advice; If you pay for it, it’s counseling; If you can use either one, it’s a miracle !
  • I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don’t seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.
  • Most people don’t act stupid – it’s the real thing.
  • Dogs are tough. I’ve been interrogating this one for hours and he still won’t tell me who a good boy is. (VIA our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Life without bears would be unbearable.

Funny Picture to Post:

Funny Facebook Comment Gone Wrong

Bonus Funny Picture: The Money Michael Jordan Makes.

Hilarious Video to put on your FB Wall:

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yMiOTxidFs[/youtube]

That video is a great conversation starter, LOL!

If you still need more funny statuses, awesome pics, and epic videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them!

Filed Under: Facebook Status Updates Tagged With: Conversation Starter, Desperate Phone Call, Epic Statuses, Facebook Celebrity, Funny Statuses, Instant Classics, Michael Jordan Money

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