Happy Monday, share these…
20 Cool Facebook Status Posts:
- You know a girl is mad when she starts off her sentence saying, “I just find it funny how…” because there’s a 99.9% chance she did not find it funny.
- “You don’t wanna hear the last line of every show do you?” – my dvr
- I’ll fight for love, but I wont compete for it.
- Tough times never last, but tough people do.
- Married people always ask when you’re getting married like they get points for recruiting to their club of misery.
- The awkward moment when people think you’re drunk when in fact you’re just a blast naturally.
- Disneyland. The world’s biggest people trap, built by a mouse.
- When I was little, I used to sing in the shower. Now? I make life decisions in there.
- A lot of people will disappoint you in life. Don’t let any of them be you.
- How about a restaurant where the minute you walk in you lose cell service and your camera app is disabled we’ll call it “ENJOY YOUR LIVES”
- I have the same level of concentration as someone defusing a bomb when Im entering the number combination of my snack in the vending machine.
- Trying to argue via text is like Being Italian and talking with handcuffs on.
- So sweet how people try to mask their crippling insecurities with bitchiness instead of alcohol like normal people.
- I’m so old, I remember when vodka only came in vodka flavor.
- At my house, it is customary for you to go back to yours as soon as possible.
- Million dollar idea: A bathroom mirror that takes pictures.
- If your drug dealer is always on time he is a cop …
- My cars heater has two settings: 1. MY FACE IS MELTING 2. Off
- If zombies ever do attack just go to Costco, they have walls, years of food and supplies, and zombies can’t get in without a Costco membership.
- Car alarms would be a lot more effective if they sounded like two people fighting. I’d peak out my window for that.
That awkward moment when you get stuck in the sink…
That’s one intense kitty 🙂 Share if you enjoyed.
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