Get Monday Going, Share one of these…
20 Entertaining Facebook Statuses:
- Do you ever have to re-read part of a book because you forgot to process what you were reading?
- Remember when I asked for your opinion. Yea, me neither.
- I like you as much as WiFi.
- Always remember who was there for you when nobody else was.
- I feel so proud when my friends tell me their parents like me like damn right they do, I’m a delight.
- Am I the only person that texts people like 4 messages at a time that could easily be put into one?
- Deep conversations with open minded people are my most favorite things ever.
- The real power of a man… Is the size of the smile on his woman’s face sitting next to him.
- Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves aren’t happy.
- Whenever I see people lined up outside a club on Friday night, I just think “look at all these poor people who don’t know Netflix exists.”
- Remember when we were all running around saying yo quiero taco bell? Good times.
- Eating a bowl of generic frosted flakes… THEY’RRRRRRRRRE ALLLLLLLLLRIGHT, I guess.
- Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a pony; he stuck a feather in his hat, and called it macaroni… That folks, is what drugs do to you.
- Falling in love, that’s rare. People mostly fall in sexual desires and call it love.
- I’m just a man standing in front of a woman, who is standing in front of another man who is in front of another woman in line at Taco Bell.
- If a 747 can carry a f*cking space shuttle on its back, I’m calling bullshit on an overweight baggage charge.
- Press 1 for someone who probably learned English last year but is going to try and communicate effectively with you anyway.
- Sometimes you can tell it’s going to be a bad day when someone you don’t like is smiling.
- If the minimum wage is good enough for all Americans, then that’s how much Congress should make as well.
- Sociologists say that social media is creating the laziest generation ever. I expressed my opinion in great detail by hitting the “Like” button.
Don’t Wake the Cat…
That’s how I feel when someone tries to wake me up!
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