Get over hump day, share one of these..
20 Crazy Facebook Status Updates:
- Instead of walking a mile in my shoes, just watch Netflix for 5 hours while eating snacks, and you’ll get the idea.
- “can you not” has been my mental response to almost everything that happens these days.
- My hobbies include putting my pajama pants on as soon as I get home.
- People with a good sense of humor have a better sense of life.
- Perks of dating me: You are dating me
- Forty percent of dating someone in another state is just asking them what their weather’s like.
- Stop asking why I’m still single. I don’t ask how you’re still married.
- The best part about being single is all the sleeping around I can do…I can sleep all over my bed.
- Keys To Success:
– Attension to detail
– Finishing what you
- Gotta thin the herd. – me eating animal crackers
- The more someone says, “you know,” the more I begin to feel better about myself.
- Son: dad I don’t know anything about women
Dad: then you are at the point where I can teach you no more, you are ready
- Sometimes people try to expose what’s wrong with you, because they can’t handle what’s right about you.
- The word “Fat” just looks like someone took a bite out of the word “Eat”
- If only there was a way to voice a highly uneducated opinion to thousands of people on a regular basis.
- “I don’t watch TV” proudly says a person who spends 8 hours a day on the internet.
- Your message was sent, received, seen, ignored, screen captured, sent to friends and ridiculed.
- Due to heavy fog, my brain has been grounded until further notice.
- You’re not important enough to have haters. You just have a few people who notice you’re an asshole.
- Nothing says IDGAF like an old lady at a slot machine wearing oxygen and smoking a cigarette.
Can’t stand it..
Seriously, why is this?!? I don’t mind when I talk normally, but one recording can crush me.
That was impressive, good boy!
Lots more status updates, funny pictures, and video, on our Fan Page.