Cat Shell Game, Baby Sloth, & Comedy Status Updates

Genius comes from within, post these…

Comedic Status Updates for Facebook:

  • LIKE IF you… walk into a room, forget what you need, walk out, and then remember.  (From our 4.5Star Rated: Funny Status iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • “LOL” is the new way of saying “I really have nothing to say.”
  • I’d explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
  • A person without knowledge of his history is like a tree without roots.
  • The only thing preventing me from smashing my alarm clock this morning is the fact that it’s my cellphone.
  • Today I went on & searched “ninjas”. The computer told me “Ninjas cannot be found”. Well played, ninjas, well played.
  • Odds are there is someone who is your “Facebook Friend” that you absolutely cannot stand and the only reason you keep them on your list is to watch their slow untimely demise.
  • Turning off the downstairs lights and running upstairs so no one kills you.  (205+Likes in 5 minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • The awkward moment when you think a customer is a salesperson.
  • Old meaning of sorry. “I won’t do it again.” New meaning of sorry. “Damn I got caught, next time I need to be more careful.”
  • Women and tax forms have a lot in common…Men love to cheat on them.
  • I love airports. They’re pretty much the only place besides a tailgate where it’s acceptable to drink at 9am.
  • Flies are everywhere, unfortunately the second I grab the fly swatter, they turn into ninjas.
  • Hospitality: making your guests feel like they’re at home, even if you wish they were.  (VIA our Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Car Rides without Music = AWKWARD

Baby Sloth may just be the most adorable thing in the world:

Baby Sloth

Undeniably cute! Post the Baby Sloth to your Facebook for insta-LIKEability.

Cat plays “Shell Game” in an awesome way…


Well played, Kitty, well played. We may have to worry about cats taking over the world after that one. You know the drill… Share on your FB wall and reap the LIKEs.

Want more funny statuses, hilarious pictures, and amazing videos… Simply, “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Try our awesome FREE Facebook App  for 100k+ Facebook statuses to choose from.