Share some laughs, use one of these…
EPIC Status Posts:
- I wish I could generate income from my sarcasm.
- You text him, he doesn’t text back. He was obviously so excited that you texted him that he fainted.
- Bitches or not, 99 problems is still a shitload of problems.
- That awkward moment when you forget what you’re watching during the commercial break.
- Laugh now but at the rate they are reproducing, the people of Walmart may one day take over the world.
- Never take for granted someone that can make you smile or the fact that you have something to smile about.
- They say love is like a roller coaster and I get it. After I see two people in love I totally want to throw up.
- Don’t you hate it when somebody turns on the light to wake you up and you’re just like -_o
- Character is the result of two things: mental attitude and the way we spend our time.
- Dance like no ones watching. Sing like no ones listening. Live everyday like Maury told you its not your baby.
- Next time one of your friends leave their Facebook open, randomly pick one of their friends and like all 973 of their photos.
- I was just walking across the street and some dude in a Smart Car didn’t see me and hit me. I think he’ll survive. The cars totaled though.
- I answered the door in my underwear. That WAS the tip, pizza guy!
- It’s not that I don’t want kids, it’s just that I don’t want a minivan.
- If one teacher cannot teach every subject, then how come one student is expected to learn all the subjects.
- This week is going by slower than a heard of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
- The best nicknames are the ones people don’t know they have.
- Everyday life can be hectic and stressful, but never forget what it’s all about: doing the hokey pokey and turning yourself around.
- Everyone is someone’s learning experience.
- Agreeing to disagree is lame. Let’s agree to take turns slapping each other until one of us admits we were wrong.
Dog Imitates Siren:
That was pretty darn good, dogs are so smart! Share if you agree.