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Top Status Updates for Facebook:
- Funny how you can update your status but not reply to my messages. (From our 4.5Star Rated: ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
- If two past lovers can remain friends, either they never were in love or they still are.
- You cannot achieve the impossible without attempting the absurd.
- New Years Resolution #1 Incorporate bacon into a majority of my meals.
- If my iPhone is so smart, why the heck did it let me call my Ex last night?
- Everything I like is either: illegal, immoral, fattening, addictive, expensive, or impossible.
- Getting to work on time only makes the day longer.
- That awkward moment when you post a funny status and there’s that one person who ruins it by saying something serious.
- Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak? (111+Likes in 7 minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
- Out of all the gifts I received, my favorite, by far, were the gift receipts.
- Alright, I’ll accept your friend request. But, one stupid status and you’re UNFRIENDED!
- Everything in moderation… Except bacon, of course.
- If you succeed in cheating someone, don’t think that the person is a fool. Realize that the person trusted you much more than you deserved.
- The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
- God has no Phone, but I talk to him. He has no Facebook, but he is still my friend. He does not have a Twitter, but I still follow him.
- The worst thing about censorship is ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ (From Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
- Holiday family gatherings are stressful because you’re forced to face the short genetic distance between you and a completely insane person.
Road to Happiness…
Haha, sometimes you see something like that on your Facebook. Can’t help but just laugh 🙂 or post a funny one liner.
Dog has some rhythm…
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