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Home Statuses Actual Facebook Statuses Bug Vacuum, 20 Funny Statuses, Ryan Reynolds Builds A Crib
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Bug Vacuum, 20 Funny Statuses, Ryan Reynolds Builds A Crib

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    Bug Vacuum

    bug vacuum shut up and take my money

    Where have you been all of my life?

    20 Funny Statuses:

    1. You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.
    2. Sometimes, not remembering may be better.
    3. Don’t play stupid with me… I’m better at it!
    4. Always give 100% at work: 12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday, 5% Friday.
    5. I always try to go the extra mile at work, but my boss always finds me and brings me back.
    6. Insert coin to view my status message
    7. I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
    8. I had a life once. Now I have an internet connection and a Mac book.
    9. The ridiculous email addresses you make when your 8 and continue to use.
    10. Dear internet, Please stop being so awesome. I need sleep.
    11. Have you ever had a fly or a small bug land on your computer screen and your first reaction is to try and scare it with the cursor??
    12. That awkward moment when someone`s staring at your keyboard while you`re typing your password.
    13. The 3 most common lies on the internet: 1. I have read and agree to the terms of service 2. Status: offline. 3. Yes, I am over 18 years old.
    14. If I call you and you don’t answer, I will sing on your voicemail.
    15. I wish the Microsoft Paperclip would just pop up when I’m making a questionable decision for my life.
    16. There should be an “undo” button in an elevator for when you accidentally hit the wrong floor.
    17. My internet is so slow, it would be faster to just drive to Google’s headquarters and ask them this shit in person.
    18. Where do all the characters go that you type on the keyboard before you realize the cursor isn’t in the box?
    19. An Apple a day keeps Windows away.
    20. Taking one last sip of my drink right before leaving a restaurant.

    Funny Pics | Gifs | Videos | Yesterdays Status Updates

    Ryan Reynolds Builds A Crib


    Watch Ryan Reynolds “assemble” an Ikea crib like a boss.

    Lots more status updates, funny pictures, and video, on our Fan Page.

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    • Assembly
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