Make your weekend last longer, share one of these hilarious statuses we collected..
20 Best Facebook Statuses:
- Facebook is the refrigerator of the internet. I keep going back to it expecting something to appear that I’ll enjoy.
- When plastic bags become currency, I will be king.
- Don’t jump to confusions.
- That awkward moment when you realize you’re walking in the wrong direction, so you hit your pockets pretending you forgot something.
- “I’m definitely going to do that tomorrow.” — Me being delusional
- Come to think of it, I’ve never seen a taxi fill up at a gas station -_-
- I only like clicky pens when I am the clicker.
- Kids consider “it’s bedtime” like it’s the first offer in the negotiation process.
- I’m having trouble telling if it’s killing me or making me stronger.
- My point of view is neither right or wrong. However, it’s educated, relevant, and born of individual thinking. So go f*ck yourself.
- Doctor: “We got your test results back. I’m so sorry–it’s Curiosity.”
Cat: “Oh my god…”
- When you pay the bills, you can be as high maintenance as you want.
- Be f*cking polite. Please.
- If kids can stay on their parent insurance until 26, parents should be able to go their kids insurance at 65. Social Security and Medicare problem solved.
- Skinny jeans… making it impossible to look sexy getting undressed since 2007.
- In the grand scheme of objects of matter in the universe, apples and oranges are actually pretty similar.
- I notice 6:19 on a clock more than any other time.
- Men look at a woman’s behind and think “Wow! What an ass.” Women look at a man’s face and think the very same thing.
- Stop looking for trouble. I’m right here.
- The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he’s too old for it.
Math Teacher Pranks His Students:
That was incredibly well put together, bravo!
Tons more status updates, funny pictures, and videos… On our Fan Page & Download our Free iPhone App. We’ll see you on Sunday for an Easter Special!