Awkward Rapture, Puppy to Adult Video, and Funny Statuses

Monday is better on Facebook by posting these…

Funny Status Updates:

  • I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure. (Courtesy of our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
  • Clearly, you are a person with an open mind. I can feel the breeze from here.
  • I have a hard time taking Katy Perry seriously because, whenever she sings about love, she’s singing about Russell Brand.
  • Cleavage is something you can look down on and approve of at the same time.
  • There’s an old proverb that says pretty much whatever you want it to.
  • I thought about going outside and doing something today but my Wi-Fi really doesn’t reach very far. ツ (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
  • Forget the “poke” button… I want a “Punch someone in the face so they know how dumb they really are” button.
  • Jail..the government’s way of sending you to your room.
  • Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes.
  • Thinks that if you status says “Its complicated” then you should stop kidding yourself and change it to “single” 😀
  • The biggest difference between my wife and a bear is that sometimes, if I play dead, the bear will leave me alone.
  • Marriage changes passion…suddenly you’re in bed with a relative.
  • She: I spend hours in front of the mirror admiring my beauty. Do you think that’s vanity? He: No. I think that’s imagination. (VIA:@FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Google turned 12 this year, so now we have 1 more year to use it before it turns into a teenager and wont answer anything!
  • Menstruation, menopause, mental breakdowns…
    Ever notice how all women’s problems begin with men?

New Rapture Billboard:

Awkward Rapture Billboard

That was rapture was Awkward wasn’t it? Hey… at least it wasn’t the end of the world.

Puppy to Adult in 40 seconds:


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