Awesome Anteater, Wedding FAIL, & Great Status Updates

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Great Status Updates for Facebook:

  • Facebook is daycare for adults. (From our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • I’ve been taking my Flintstones’ vitamins daily, but I still can’t start a car with my feet.
  • Ever had to force a smile while someone takes forever trying to figure out how to use the camera?
  • As I said before, I never repeat myself.
  • Do thin girls know about delicious food?
  • I’ve decided to get in shape. The shape will be “potato”.
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  • Somebody needs to teach opportunity how to use a doorbell.
  • When I see someone driving the same car I’m driving, I always peer in to make sure it’s not me from another dimension.
  • Dear Heart, Please stop getting involved in everything. Your job is to pump blood, that’s it.
  • The only good thing about being an alcoholic is that no one ever asks me to drive them anywhere.
  • Won a time machine on eBay. Disappointed when I received a clock.
  • You call it poor parenting, I call it raising free range children. (From our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff)
  • Two people in every one is a schizophrenic.

Thousands More Funny Status Updates…

Everybody CHILL out… I got this!

Everybody Chill

Post that one on your Facebook Wall for tons of hilarious comments and LIKES!

Wedding Entrance FAIL:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lK3rWxjLCEc[/youtube]

LOL, seemed awesome then…. BAM! Glad to see no one got hurt.

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