Saying what you’re thinking since 2010…
20 Clever Facebook Statuses:
- Bill Gates and I have a combined fortune of around 80 billions of dollars.
- There is no “u” in awesome… But there is a “me”.
- Distance sucks…my room is so far from the kitchen.
- There’s probably an employee at State Farm really named “Jake” who sick of everyone’s jokes.
- Babysitters are just teenagers who act like adults so adults can go out and act like teenagers.
- If I don’t talk to myself, who will?
- The next “60’s” are closer than the last “60’s”.
- I’m that friend you have to explain to people before you introduce me… And apologize for after.
- hmmm that’s a bit too harsh
let me put “lol” at the end of it
- I can’t be friends with sensitive ass people, I joke around way too much.
- Where can I get one of those Kim Kardashian jobs where I’m basically just paid to exist?
- My taste of music goes from heavy metal all the way to Disney soundtracks…
- I want to push all your buttons. Starting with mute.
- I’m trying to give up sexual innuendoes…but it’s hard…so hard.
- You know your childhood is over when you fall asleep on the couch…and wake up on the couch.
- Sorry I’m late. I didn’t really want to come.
- I have an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other. I’m also deaf in one ear.
- There is no excuse for laziness. But let me know if you find one.
- I wish my wallet came with free refills.
- Am I the only one who thinks the Pringles guy and Monopoly guy are related?
I’d be his friend…
For real, what a funny guy.
Disciplined Dog Holds Back..
The look on his face is priceless.
Lots more status updates, funny pictures, and video, on our Fan Page.