Happy Friday, you made it! Share one of these…
20 Laughable Facebook Status Updates:
- It’s fall, which means my TV game is on point and my social game is at an all time fail level.
- I embarrass myself in front of myself.
- Sorry for calling you a bitch. Thought you already knew…
- There is no evidence that exists that life should be taken seriously.
- I carry a knife, but it’s just in case of cake.
- Take those tears, dry them out to make salt, and have yourself a margarita.
- Single people: “Wanna get crazy and handcuff me tonight?”
Married people: “Wanna get crazy and add bacon to the sandwiches tonight?” - Music is a good place to hide.
- But, what if my favorite thing to do is nothing….?
- For every action, there’s an equal and opposite reaction. Plus a social media overreaction.
- You can either wear granny panties OR yoga pants – not both. Pick one.
- 10 million people share the same birthday as you. Your personalized horoscope means shit.
- With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything.
- One of the saddest days of my life was when I heard that bears sleep for half the year and I realized I had been born the wrong species.
- If you emphasize the ‘po’ in police they’re probably already after you.
- Instead of knowing what the #1 song was when you were born it would be cool if it could tell you what the #1 song will be when you die. That way when you start hearing it on the radio, you’ll know that the end is near.
- I have 2 missed calls from my mother. I think it’s safe to say that by now there’s a rescue team out there looking for me.
- The only way to communicate with a drunk person is to get hammered too.
- Don’t you hate it when spiders bite you and you get like zero superpowers?
- If you say “Raise Up Lights” you just said “Razor Blades” in an Austrailian accent.
Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates…
Baby Elephant Slips, Watch for Moms Reaction:
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ReNavhcXUYk[/youtube]
That’s so fricken’ adorable! Elephants are so smart. What a great family 🙂 Share if you enjoyed!
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