Get through Tuesday, share one of these..
20 Silly Facebook Status Updates:
- Did some financial planning and it looks like I can retire at 62 and live comfortably for eleven minutes.
- A college diploma is just a receipt.
- Why do we close our eyes when we pray, cry, kiss or dream? Because the most beautiful things in life are not seen but felt by the heart.
- Do you ever look at your pet and you can literally feel your heart melting because you love them so much?
- Hope nobody has a video of me trying to get the fourth corner of a fitted sheet over the mattress.
- Don’t worry about walking a mile in my shoes. Just try spending a day thinking in my head.
- Accidentally played dad instead of dead when I encountered a bear and now it can ride a bike without training wheels.
- You know you’re getting older when your friends start using the term “Pregnant” instead of “Knocked Up,”
- Well, guy I’ve only met once who remembers my name,…you win this round.
- I find if you sprinkle some bacon bits on a salad, but don’t actually add any salad, then its a pretty good salad.
- Checking my phone one more time before I go to sleep because apparently 533 times wasn’t enough today.
- The saying ‘Money can’t buy you happiness’ should be changed to ‘Money can’t prevent sadness’
- It’s 2015, why cant you unselect a floor in an elevator yet?
- If kindness really kills, you’ll always be completely safe around me.
- If an officer asks “do you know why I pulled you over?” “Because it’s the only way to get girls to talk to you” is a bad answer, apparently.
- He’s lol. I’m haha. I just don’t see this ever working.
- A man went to the moon and only took five pictures, maybe you oughta cut down those 47 selfies for your trip to the bathroom, sweetheart.
- Taking your pants off is a good way to let someone know you feel comfortable in their home.
- I wish I could just cut out the middleman and have the light honk when it turns green.
- Carrots are a great thing to eat when you are hungry and want to stay that way.
Funny Pics | Gifs | Videos | Yesterdays Status Updates
My autobiography..
Pretty much sums it up.
Bear & Man spook each other..
Haha, not sure who was more scared, the bear or the man. Either way, I re-watched it 20 times just to be sure it was as funny as the first time, it was. Feel free to share 🙂
Lots more status updates, funny pictures, and video, on our Fan Page.