Welcome back friends. Time to start another awesome week! You’re going to have a good week, I just know it. Here are some witty status updates for Facebook to help get you through the week…
Witty Status Updates for Facebook:
- I intend to live forever – so far so good.
- 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
- The bank called me because of suspicious activity on my debit card. I couldn’t believe I bought a gym membership either
- I was never my mother’s favorite, which I guess would have been OK, if I wasn’t an only child. (from our Facebook Fan Page)
- The Old Lie: “The check is in the mail.” The New Lie: “I haven’t checked my email.”
- I used to be a marathon runner, but couldn’t stand the agony of de feet.
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