Weekend Status Updates, Shakespeare’s Facebook, & 31 Nerd Jokes

Inspiration for your statuses, share these…

Status Updates for the Weekend:

  • The quickest way to lose all faith in humanity is to read the comments section for almost anything on the internet.  (From our 4.5 Star Rated: Funny Status iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • Looking back on your old Facebook pictures and thinking “What the hell was I doing” ” omg embarrassing eww “
  • It has never stopped surprising me how exhausting it is to do nothing all day.
  • M̸o̸n̸d̸a̸y̸ T̸u̸e̸s̸d̸a̸y̸ W̸e̸d̸n̸e̸s̸d̸a̸y̸ T̸h̸u̸r̸s̸d̸a̸y̸ Friday Saturday Sunday
  • That awkward moment when you shout out the wrong answer in class with confidence.
  • Hakuna Matata > YOLO
  • Best kind of laughter: Laughing so hard your laugh becomes silent.
  • I just burned 1200 calories.I forgot the pizza in the oven.  (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • Homeless people are just hardcore campers.
  • If you still talk about it, you still care about it.
  • I run slow when little kids are chasing me so they think they’re fast.
  • The way I feel when a waiter brings my food is probably similar to the excitement of a dude on Maury who just got told he’s not the father.
  • Agreeing with people so they SHUT UP!
  • The best thing about telepathy is…I know, right? (VIA Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Ever feel like your pet can read your thoughts?
  • It wasn’t me…. (shaggy voice)

IF Shakespeare rocked a Facebook account it might look something like this:

Shakespeare Facebook

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31 Nerd Jokes – dumb dumbs need not apply…

Some gems in there! Share this funny video with the smart crowd on your Facebook lists.

Bonus Video: Floating Cup @ Drivethroughs

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