You know why? Because you’re going to make your friends laugh, with these…
Funny Status Updates for Facebook:
I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App – Huge *Free* update coming next week!)
Vegetarian: Native American definition for “lousy hunter”.
- Tectonic plates… The perfect gift for the couple who are drifting apart.
- Insanity. Not just a defense. It’s a lifestyle too.
- After 5 vodka and Red Bulls, you start wearing your Lindsay Lohan costume.
- When the last tree is cut, the last river poisoned and the last fish caught, we will discover that we can’t eat money.
- “Sit down. I’ve got some bad news.” (Every Milkman’s boss 30 years ago)
- Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. ツ ( “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily Funny Status Updates)
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
There’s no I in you. Yet.
Some women are terribly hard to please… the rest are impossible!
Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.
- Apple. You can buy better but you can’t pay more.
- Cigarettes are like hamsters… perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and set it on fire.
- I’ve got a full 6 pack, but it lacks the plastic thingy to holds it all together. (From our Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
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