Thursdays Funny Status Updates!

Happy Thursday friends!  Here is what you came here for…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • I never understood why guys always have their hands down their pants. Then last night I found myself watching TV with my hand in my bra. It finally occurred to me…when you’ve got something great, you want to hold onto it.
  • Losing weight doesn’t seem to be working, so I’m concentrating on getting taller.
  • If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea… does that mean that one enjoys it? (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App – Over 25,000/monthly users that average 5+comments per status update!)
  • The worst was getting in trouble with one of your friend’s parents.
  • Just caught my wife in bed with my best friend. I threw her out, then grabbed him and shouted, “Bad Dog! Bad Dog!” ツ (Want more like this one?  “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily funny status updates)
  • I recycle plastic. Here.. give me your credit card and I’ll show you how.
  • You can pay for almost anything automatically now a days, but if the company ever owes you money, it takes 3 bloody weeks to process.
  • If life were more like a movie, we’d all be dead after about 90 minutes.
  • “Do you have a cell phone?” You might as well be asking me if I have a pulse.
  • I don’t understand why they call them men’s dress shoes because they don’t go with any of my dresses.

No clean cereal bowls? Line a strainer with plastic wrap. Laziness is the father of invention.

Funny Picture to Post:

Ah, that explains a lot.

And I couldn’t resist posting this awesome pic:

Real or fake, you decide!

Funny Video to Post (On someones FB Bday):


Hahah funny!  Come back tomorrow for the world famous weekend wrap-up Cya then! If you need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.