Congratulations you’ve made it to the middle of the week. Laugh your way through the rest of the week with these…
Funny Status Updates for Facebook:
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App)
- You can save a lot on college by learning calligraphy and making your own diploma.
- Panhandling is so much easier with a red bucket and a bell.
- At the concert of Beethoven’s works, it was the bottom of Ninth and the bassists were loaded
- All I know about money matters is that money matters.
- Apparently, “I judge a great wine by its alcohol content”, doesn’t impress wine snobs
- It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look! ツ ( “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily Funny Status Updates)
- In retrospect, back in my club days I should have recognized there was a reason the beat always sounded like DOUCHE DOUCHE DOUCHE.
- Kid Rock must be an Adult Rock by now.
- “FOILED AGAIN!” –Leftovers
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
- Build a man a fire he’s warm for a day, set him on fire and he’s warm the rest of his life. (From our Twitter Account: @FreeFunnyStuff )
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