Speeding Cat, Making Iced Tea like a Boss, & Funny Statuses

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Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • Spotted: Homeless man with a sign that said bet you can’t hit me with a quarter! Genius! (From our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • If you think your dog can’t count, try putting three dog treats in your pocket and then give him only two of them.
  • My idea of a high stress job is one where you work with other people.
  • If money talks, why won’t it have a conversation with me?
  • Trouble defies the law of gravity. It’s easier to pick up than to drop.
  • If the US defaults, will China repossess our elected officials? Just thinking out loud here. #wishfulthinking
  • All I want is a little more than I’ll ever get.
  • A rumor goes in one ear and then out of many mouths.
  • If your plan A doesn’t work, don’t sweat it. The alphabet has 25 more letters. (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page , 59+ LIKES in just 3 minutes)
  • I was told the training process for cats is quite difficult. It wasn’t. My cat had me trained in two days.
  • The four stages of man: Infancy, Childhood, Adolescence and Obsolescence.
  • The awkward moment when the Dentists asks you a questions whilst their hands are in your mouth.
  • I tried to write a drinking song. Couldn’t make it past the first few bars.
  • You have the right to remain silent. So please shut up.
  • If your company sends a survey to see how my experience with customer service was, you clearly don’t understand the problem.
  • You’re only young once. If you act like a fool after that, you’re gonna need a new excuse.
  • Leadership is the ability to get men to do what they don’t want to do and like it.
  • The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn.  (Our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff)
  • I won’t rest until I find a cure for Insomnia.
Thousands More Funny Status Updates…

Speeding Kitty:

Speeding Cat

Did you see that CAT? He was flying!!

How to Make Iced Tea, Like a BOSS:


Try that one next time you’re at a party! LOL 🙂

Bonus Video: Pawn Stars circa 2003

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