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Cool Facebook Status Updates:
- Men get frustrated because they don’t understand how women think. Women get frustrated because they understand how men think.
- I have lots of great personality traits. Or as my doctor calls them, symptoms.
- I wouldn’t really mind being left to my own devices as long they were fully charged and there was WiFi.
- There are starving kids in Africa. IHOP has a “Kids Eat Free” promotion. Just build an IHOP in Africa. Problem solved.
- Almost considered doing something with my life, but then I sat down and logged into Facebook.
- There are over 4 million workplace injuries reported every year. Play it safe…call in sick tomorrow.
- McDonald’s should have an express drive thru lane just for people who need french fries.
- Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.
- Still waiting for one of Taylor Swift’s ex-boyfriends to write a song called “Maybe You’re the Problem”…
- Google: I know everything. Facebook: I know everyone. Internet: Without me, you’re nothing. Electricity: Keep talking fools.
- If the Mayans have taught us anything, it is that if you don’t finish something, it’s not the end of the world.
- “Crap, I’ve got a doctor’s appointment tomorrow.” “Just cancel it. Tell them you’re sick.”
- Turns out, “Definitely not still working here!” is not a great answer to: “Where do you see yourself in 10 years?”
- If there’s one person that could persuade me to go back to school, it would have to be Shannen Doherty. Good call, Education Connection.
- Tell everyone you meet you know how to surf. No one checks.
- I can’t get out of bed. These blankets have accepted me as one of their own and If I leave now I might lose their trust.
- If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. And if they won’t leave, get a restraining order.
- Coffins are creepy unless you put fluorescent lights inside and tell people it will make them tan.
- If alcohol kills germs and laughter is the best medicine, I’m the healthiest person on the planet.
- I dont think I could ever stab someone… I can barely get the straw in the Capri Sun.
Looks like the P0wer Rangers predicted the Google Logo:
So they were mighty morphin’ power rangers from the future. Seemed legit, and now we know… In the future Google runs everything including Space Travel.
Crazy Car Chase:
LOL, did not see that one coming 🙂 Share this unexpectedly awesome car chase video on your Facebook for instant likes, comments, and karma.
Plenty more status updates, funny pictures, and videos… On our Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.
