Happy Monday To You…

Welcome back friends!  Hope you had a wonderful weekend.  Laugh your way through Monday with these funny things you can post to your Facebook account…

*** Feeling funny?  Submit your own & vote on Status Updates! ***

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

• I danced like no one was watching. Court date is pending…
• People tend to make rules for others and exceptions for themselves. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App – Over 25k/users that average over 5+comments & likes per status update!)
• Why are women wearing perfumes that smell like flowers? Men don’t like flowers. I’ve been wearing a great new scent. It’s called New Car Interior.
• Rmbr – dooont fbook whljik you driv. It is dngrou7s.
• There is an official UN appointee for First Contact should aliens arrive. I can’t believe I didn’t get that job.
• Discretion is being able to raise your eyebrow instead of your voice.
• I like really dark movie theaters. That way, I don’t have to buy my own popcorn.
• Sometimes, I think the only thing in the grocery store that’s not fat-free is me.
• Filling out a job application. Under ‘Military Experience’ I put that I once went commando for 4 days in a row.
• Aibohphobia: The fear of palindromes.
• Good friends make the world go round, but good tequila makes the room go round. ツ (Want more like this one?  “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily funny status updates)
• If it ain’t broke, don’t let me any.where.near.it.
• They arrested the bartender for taking liquor home. I believe the official charge was emboozlement. (By way of @FreeFunnyStuff our red-headed stepchild of a twitter account.)

He who laughs last might just be in a different time zone.

Funny Picture to Post:

Funny video to Post:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhE1Cq2kHZw[/youtube]