Enjoy the wonderful weekend while it lasts!  Make your Facebook friends laugh with these…

The “Best” in Funny Status:

  • Just because you have one doesn’t mean you have to act like one. (Courtesy of our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone/iPod App)
  • Son, when I was your age, our video game controllers were hard wired to the console. And Mario had to walk uphill both ways to the castle.
  • Ironically, it’s the getting ahead that I’m running behind on.
  • Women like silent men, they think they’re listening.
  • I write “Wake Up” on my To-Do list so I can start the day off accomplishing something.
  • Facebook: A place for liars and braggers to unite.
  • Has anyone even thought to look in San Diego for Carmen Sandiego? Think about it, it’s a little *too* obvious. Which means it’s perfect.
  • Motels 1 through 5 must’ve been real dumps.
  • Got my hair done again. I’m so blonde now I can barely spell my last name.
  • In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. ツ (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
  • The Walk Of Shame: When you toss a paper ball in the trash, miss, then have to go get it.
  • My son has just earned his first boy scout award for ‘video gaming’. I guess the next ones will be for ‘social ineptitude’ & ‘pale skin’.
  • The world is composed of givers and takers..the takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better.
  • My life would be a lot easier if when shopping online there was a “Sort by least ugly” option.
  • A man’s life is spent between episodes of women being mad at him.
  • No one ever gives me a hand, but I often get a finger.
  • If you can’t convince them, confuse them. (VIA our Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Sometimes I don’t even know when I’m being sarcastic.

Link of the day: Next time you need to fix something try legos.

Funny Picture for your Facebook Profile:

Unstoppable Turtle Machine!

Kid Kicks Soccer Ball Into His Face:

That’ll get some quality comments & likes from your FB Friends!

Like the site? You’ll love the Funny Status T-Shirts.

Have a safe weekend and please join us Monday for more hilarious content. If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them!