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If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App)
- Facebook is a procrastinator’s best frenemy.
- You can rely on me. I’ve been married. I’m trained to follow orders.
- You never hear skinny people saying, “I’m just small boned.”
- “Age is just a number.” “Yeah? Jail is just a room.”
- On the other hand… You have different fingers. ツ ( “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily Funny Status Updates)
- I start what I finish.
- At this point, camels should know better than to put straw anywhere near their backs.
- I have a black eye in karate.
- Mila Kunis broke up with Macaulay Culkin? Are they really broken up? Maybe Mila just went on vacation & forgot him. Happens to him a lot.
- Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift? (From our Twitter Account: @FreeFunnyStuff )
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