Get mo’ LIKEs share these…
Great Status Updates for Facebook:
- Dieting is for the birds. Which is why you hardly ever se a fat bird. (From our 4.5Star Rated: ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
- I used to use expensive, illegal substances to blur the lines of reality. Now, I just take off my glasses.
- Sometimes the one you want is actually the one you’re best without.
- Trust is like paper…Once it’s crumpled, it can’t be perfect again.
- One spelling mistake can destroy your life.A Husband sent this to his wife:I’m having a wonderful time wish you were her.”
- I hate when I cant find my phone because my bed ate it.
- I yawn all day at work & school. But when it comes to at night, I’m not tired at all. (128+Likes in 9 minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
- Agreeing to everything someone is saying so that they stop talking…
- Crap happens, Just flush the toilet and move on.
- A slug is just a snail with a housing problem.
- All I really want is to be understood. That’s why I’m yelling.
- A plastic surgeon gets paid way more than a tire mechanic even though they both get paid to fix flats.
- What did the blanket say when it fell of the bed? Awww Sheeeeeet!
- I’m a girl. I overreact. I underestimate. I overestimate. I over think everything. I dream big. And when I say I love you, I’m not lying.
- Some open minds should be closed for repairs. (VIA Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
- Lately, it seems to cost more to amuse a child than it once did to educate his father.
Someone has a little too much time on their hands! Post on your Facebook wall and watch the LIKEs and Comments pour in.
Facebook Voicemails from Mom:
Haha, I think we all have someone in our family that’s “new” to Facebook that asks similarly hilarious questions. Share this with your Facebook friends and ask them what they think!