Make your Facebook friends ROFL…
Top Status Updates for Facebook:
- Nobody’s phone is ever off. They’re lying. (From our *UPDATED TODAY!* ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
- Poodles aren’t as absorbent as they look.
- The reason women ask so many questions is because they have an extra why chromosome.
The trouble with my budget is there are far more ways to get into debt than there are to get out of it.
Take your troubles like a man. Blame them on your wife.
I used to be lost in the shuffle. Now, I just shuffle along with the lost.
- We make a living by what we earn. We make a life by what we give.
People liking my status from a week ago on Facebook proves that I have stalkers.
- *Wake up in middle of night, look at clock* yes I still have time to sleep.
- Tired apostrophes risk falling into a comma.
- The 3 fastest means of communication: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman. (152+Likes in 11minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
One spelling mistake can destroy your life.A Husband sent this to his wife:I’m having a wonderful time wish you were her.”
- Compromise is hard to swallow because it never tastes like chocolate.
My parents used to be happy when I took naps… but now they think I’m lazy.
- I don’t know my friends address but i know exactly where their house is! 🙂
Vandals destroyed a bunch of road signs last night. They pulled out all the stops.
- Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
Life rarely hands me anything. Am I in the wrong line? (VIA Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff)
I thank, therefore you’re welcome.
I bwoke my ear…
Adorable puppy pictures will always get you LIKEs and comments on Facebook! Post this one and find out just how many.
Manatee Face Smush:
Guess humans aren’t the only ones who do that! LOL 🙂 Your Facebook Friends will love that video, add it to your wall.
More great status updates, awesome pictures, and funny videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Visit our awesome Funny Status section for thousands of Facebook statuses to choose from!