Welcome back to the #1 Status Update website. Updated daily with funny status updates for your Facebook profile…
- I love watching two girls meet each other. It’s easily the most fake thing I have ever seen.
- I do ten sit ups every morning. It might not sound like much, but there are only so many times you can hit the snooze button.
If you can’t get a lawyer who knows the law, get one who knows the judge.
Wealthy people miss one of life’s greatest thrills…making the last car payment.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
- Women like silent men, they think they’re listening.
- I could talk about myself for hours. But the second someone asks me to tell them a little bit about myself? I can’t even remember my name.
- I don’t know what I’d do without Facebook. Probably my work. ツ (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
- It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in divorce. But hey, the other half end in death. You could be one of the lucky ones!
- Madness has no purpose or reason; but it may have a goal.
- The world is round, so it has no point.
- What’s another word for thesaurus? (VIA our Tweeter:@FreeFunnyStuff )
- How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?
Status of the Day:
Funny Video for Facebook:
If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post: “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them!