Bug Vacuum, 20 Funny Statuses, Ryan Reynolds Builds A Crib

Bug Vacuum Where have you been all of my life? 20 Funny Statuses: You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream. Sometimes, not remembering may be better. Don't play stupid with me......

Edna Made Knows Best, 20 Funny Statuses, Jimmy Fallon’s Good Burger

Edna Made Knows Best Madonna should've listened to Edna Made! 20 Funny Statuses: If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments The quickest way to double your money is to fold it...

Trust Fall, 20 Funny Statuses, Missing: Stapler

Trust Fall! Share if you've ever had a friend trust fall on you! 20 Funny Statuses: Dear Facebook, Please stop asking me what's on my mind. I'm gonna get myself in trouble if I keep spilling my...

Andy’s Coming, 20 Funny Statuses, Kung Fu Patty Cake

Andy's Coming! Share if you want to try this! 20 Funny Statuses: Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from. The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you...

Safety First, 20 Statuses, Ellen Scares Eric Stonestreet

Safety First Safety is obviously her main concern. 20 Funny Statuses: Trying to finish a dream by going back to sleep! Looking at your best friend and laughing uncontrollably for no reason When you text someone to say you...

Good News, 20 Statuses, Swiper No Swiping

Trying to make small talk.. 20 Funny Status: People in sleeping bags are the soft tacos of the bear world. There's no such thing as too old for Disney. Time for a box o' wine and a crazy...

Shoot To Turn Off, 20 Funny Statuses, Whisper Wilson

Shoot To Turn Off Storm Trooper Clock 20 Funny Statuses Worth Sharing: I could defuse a bomb if it sounded like an alarm clock and I was sleeping. Always keep a bottle of wine in the fridge...

Nerds In The Yard, Statuses to Steal, & Supercats

My Pokemon brings all the nerds to the yard.. Never trade your Charizard.. 20 Funny Status Updates Worth Stealing: "Don't make me regret this." -things I think when accepting a friend request. Did some financial planning and it...