FunnyStatuses for the Weekend


The wonderful weekend has arrived!  Don’t worry we won’t tell your friends if you borrow these…

The Best Funny Status Updates for Facebook (this weekend):

  • Alcohol is not the answer, it just makes you forget the question. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App)
  • Finally realizing that Hotel California is about Facebook. “…you can check in anytime you like, but you can never leave…”
  • Bacon and eggs walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”
  • This census and Tax stuff is crap. I want to live in a country that doesn’t assign homework.
  • I just got a papercut… we’ll just see if I recycle this week… stupid tree.
  • I’m so thankful for my kids.If it weren’t for them I’d never know what a cool sound my vacuum cleaner makes when it sucks up Rice Crispies.
  • If Yao Ming decides to a get cat, he should name it Meow Ming. ツ ( VIA our Funny Status Update Fan Page)
  • Do you want to speak to the man in charge or to the woman who knows what’s going on?
  • Never assume anything but the position.
  • I would have e-mailed you sooner, but my cat ate my mouse.
  • I start to feel really anxious when my work piles up. I never know what to ignore first.
  • Forgive me Facebook, for I have sinned. It has been four days since my last tweet. Because, you know… booze and Words With Friends.
  • Stupid mistakes are made by others. I only make unavoidable errors. (VIA our Twitter Account: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Please don’t tell my three year old his oversized black calculator isn’t really an iPad. He’d be crushed to learn his dad lied to him.

Have an iPad?  Check out the awesome *NEW* Funny Status Updates for Facebook HD app for iPad.

Funny Picture to Post:

If Will Ferrell was a dog.

Epic Video to Post:


Post that and watch peoples reactions.  What would you do???  I’d freak out!!! Awesome prank executed on a massive scale.

Funniest Thing On Facebook This Week: I Crashed Paris Hilton’s Birthday And Accidentally The Whole Cake

Have a safe weekend and stop back on Monday for more hilarious content. If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.