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- God must love stupid people. He made SO many. (Courtesy of our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone/iPod App)
- You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they’re going.
- The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
- I don’t give a crap, but if I did, you’d be the first person I’d give it to.
- If you only have one photo on you’re Facebook you are either a spammer, or a loser, either way don’t request me as a friend.
- The wise man sees but does not speak. The fool sees but speaks anyway. Then what does that make the blind mute?
- Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking? Because those men already have boyfriends.
- There are three kinds of people: The ones who learn by reading. The ones who learn by observation. And the rest of them who have to touch the fire to learn it’s hot.
- Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you’re a jerk for doing it again.
- Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.
- Oh, crap. You’re going to try and cheer me up, aren’t you? (VIA our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff )
- “Numbers don’t lie.” No, but people certainly lie about numbers.
Funny Picture to Post:
Justin Bieber + Mr. Bean = Mr. Justin Beanber (via Reddit)
Funny Video of the Day:
Best part of American Idol… The ridiculous auditions!
Bonus funny video: Hangover 2 Trailer Full
If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post: “Like” our FB Fan Page& Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them!