Be Facebook Famous with these Funny Statuses


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Funny Statuses:

  • God must love stupid people. He made SO many. (Courtesy of our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone/iPod App)
  • You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they’re going.
  • The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
  • I don’t give a crap, but if I did, you’d be the first person I’d give it to.
  • If you only have one photo on you’re Facebook you are either a spammer, or a loser, either way don’t request me as a friend.
  • The wise man sees but does not speak. The fool sees but speaks anyway. Then what does that make the blind mute?
  • Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking? Because those men already have boyfriends.
  • There are three kinds of people: The ones who learn by reading. The ones who learn by observation. And the rest of them who have to touch the fire to learn it’s hot.
  • Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you’re a jerk for doing it again.
  • Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.
  • Oh, crap. You’re going to try and cheer me up, aren’t you? (VIA our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff )
  • “Numbers don’t lie.” No, but people certainly lie about numbers.

Boost your statuses with our free text tools like:  ʇxǝʇ dılɟMaкє уоця $тaтц$ Aшё$омё!

Funny Picture to Post:

Justin Beanber

Justin Bieber + Mr. Bean = Mr. Justin Beanber (via Reddit)

Funny Video of the Day:


Best part of American Idol… The ridiculous auditions!

Bonus funny video: Hangover 2 Trailer Full

If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan PageDownload our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them!